Three Scenes from a surgery

I’m being silly. No, that’s too kind: I’m being stupid. I desperately want to write, want to update this blog and take it to new places because I’m sick and tired of thinking – and writing – about being sick and tired (and maybe I don’t have to for a while!) and I want to work on my plays again and write the essays kicking around my brain and I’ve got this idea for a novel and…

But I don’t.

What I have been doing is everything I can to avoid writing. Photographing. Having an operation (again). Reading. Walking the dog. Recovering from said operation. And… uh… did I say photographing? It’s all just surgery-excused writer’s block.

Oh, my new photography obsession is a fabulous mania. I’m having a blast learning all manner of photo techniques, how to visualize the shot, taking classes and reading books on the subject. And of course snapping pics, hundreds, anywhere and everything, to the bored distraction of my friends, family, and dog. Somehow all the trauma and medications of the last three years left the visual parts of my brain functioning better – certainly more willingly – than the language parts. But photography isn’t writing. I need to write.

Well, the surgery excuse is now officially old. The operation succeeded – mostly – I’ve recovered – mostly – the dreaded bubble‘s gone – mostly – and I even made it to the gym this week – mostly. Time to put fingers to the keyboard. Before I shoot at the other writing goals though, I need to exorcise the health stuff.

So here, as a sort of mopping-up exercise, are three scenes from a surgery, which took place November 5th.

1. Nooo! I don’ neeed a kidneeee!     

In which the joys of pain meds reveal their dark side.

2. “Do you know why you’re still here, Mr. B?”

In which I learn you can wander the halls too long.

3. Terror.

Yes… well… there’s no other word with quite the impact of “terror” these days, is there? Yet I have to use it: all the synonyms I can find really just tell a part of the whole… totality we call terror. This post will be along shortly. Nailing down what I’m trying to say isn’t easy.

There. Medical demons exercised with the exception of #3. When it is done, I get to move on. Next posts, already in the boiler, will be on hypnotherapy and surgery, and just how much is a cure worth? Stay tuned.

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2 Responses to “Three Scenes from a surgery”

  1. Lisa Paul Says:

    Ed,

    Why not use your procrastination method du jour to jump start your writing? When you take one of the fantastic pictures you’ve been posting to Project365, why not cross-post it here with a little essay on how you got the picture, a little on the technical aspect of how you made it happen, and some musings on how the scene/picture made you feel or what you responded to?

    Ernest Hemingway, an author I hate, nonetheless gave some writing advice that I love. He said “Every day, you must sit down and write the truest thing you know.” By which I think he was advocating for 1) just DO IT EVERY DAY and 2) write what you know.

    Good luck.

  2. sazzy Says:

    Ed – Project 365 has an amazing ability to kick start so many good things….stick with us and I’ll bet you’ll start writing again. It has made amazing changes in my life.

    I work as a part time receptionist at a think tank in back of stanford u….we have 40+ academics from all over the world on fellowships. they are there mostly to write. One fellow in particular made a huge impression on me. he convinced our asst director to work on her book first thing in the morning. he studied “performance” issues and is convinced this is the time of day the best creative work is done…that advice seemed to work for her.

    I think Lisa’s advice sounds great too.

    I look forward to your photos and progress!

    sazzy

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