If you are, have been, or may become a Rod Serling fan, you’ll understand how I came to write this poem a few years ago while staring out the window on a long flight.

Descent

by Ed Brownson

Through acrylic
I expect to see Rod Serling sitting on wing
Legs crossed, flashing that famous half smile
A tray table in front of him fastened to nothing
Holds his ancient Underwood, the sort with
Circular keys in bleacher rows and the “W”
Improbably missing. Lack of a “W” is no
Impediment for Rod: his forefingers push
Letters onto a sheet of paper carefully
Avoiding the bare metal lurking between
The “Q” and the “E”.

Once in a while
He leans back for a frown or forward
Into a thought and I worry he’s conjuring the deep
Or bringing us down on some crepuscular
Island where deception holds court and Rod has
A lock on the rules because – no question here –
He wrote them. Then turbulence, and all of us
Who chose window over aisle press eyeballs
To plastic thinking angels or speed bumps or
Aliens at least but Rod just flashes the rest of his
Smile and shrugs.

Now the Underwood
Transforms into a flight recorder box – how in hell
Do I know what that thing is? – and unflappable
Rod starts tearing it apart. I bang on the window
Loudly objecting: dismantling a recorder while sky
Diving doesn’t seem very wise. Next, no warning
We’re inside a cloud and Rod and the tray table
And the box disappear along with the wing
As if we’d snapped tight those cheap shutters
That cover the windows. Long seconds pass by
Before we break back into blue.

Rod’s gone!
No sign of his seat on the wing, no tray, no
Recorder even the Underwood’s not to be found.
Panicked I crawl over the guy snoring next to me
Sprawl across a couple in the seats beyond the aisle
Hoping he’s only switched wings, but Rod’s not there
And I have to think hard about where else I can
Look ‘cause I really need to ask him how to write
A story with no “W’s” and while I’m at it find out
Why his skinny black necktie never once
Blew out in the wind.

END

I’ve published Descent with a Creative Commons license.
You can print the poem but you can’t rewrite it and  you can’t publish it without contacting me.

Creative Commons License

…Bang! I slam into another concrete wall pretending to be a speed bump.

  Twilight, Shelter Cove, CA

In January after surgery took me down, I was miserable enough to ask myself – for the first time ever – the big question: Should I stay or should I go? Just hang it up and dance down the tunnel of light? And for the first time, I was indifferent to the answer. But as I recovered my stubbornness kicked in - late, but much to my relief - and so here I am.

Five months later I found myself trying to cope with a bout of confidence of all things, struggling to really believe I’d regained something of a semi-functional life for the first time in two years. I even got to take a road trip. Then I was knocked flat by a simple endoscopy (tubes and cameras down the throat for a veinal lookie-loo) which re-triggered my ever-hovering hepatitis C and left me on the couch panting and deranged for two weeks.

  King's Range, CA

Recovering from that would-be-funny-if-it-didn’t-suck experience, I’ve spent the last month plus agonizing over whether to have yet more surgery to fix the ever-enlarging bubble on my abdomen, the result of last winter’s hernia repair that didn’t go so well. The bubble’s spawning now, with two tiny new bubbles popping up. I swear Alien’s in there doing something evil. (The surgery decision: No! NO! NO KNIVES! Not ’til I have to! [Which may be sooner than I'm telling everybody.])

And through all this, my new liver, which had actually taken to behaving itself, decided to do some sulking again. And so now I’m back in this gray area where some things work, sort of, other things not so much, not knowing day to day what it’ll be like and wondering just what the $#^% “health” is, anyway?

I suppose the biggest epiphany I’ve had from all this is something I already knew: There’s this line running through my life. Stay on one side of it, and the deities smile benignly and permit me to muddle along. Cross that line, and bang! (there’s that ‘bang’ again) those same gods set the hounds from Dante’s circles on me. This line is as thin as a new-bought razor blade.

  Otto taking a beach nap

Anyway, I’ve decided to post the various fragments I’ve been working on, plus a few off-topic bits (a poem, anyone?) just so I can make some sort of break with the last six months – writing-wise, anyway – and start anew. Consider these posts - they’ll be showing up over the next week - a mashup of fragments from my muse and detrius from my mental garbage collector. Oh, and there’ll be pictures: I’m obsessed these days with photography. These are from a drive to California’s Lost Coast last week.